Patrick Schwarzenegger has no discernible talents that we are aware of, but he has fame on both sides of his family tree and money to play with for the rest of his life. And so it was always pretty curious why he’d waste his time hanging out with a girl that looks like a 12-year old boy (Miley Cyrus). Now he’s dating some hot piece of ass (Abby Champion) who may last a few weeks.
So now we honor 5 more bros who really should drop their female counterpart on account of them not being at all attractive in any way possible.
Tony Goldwyn and Jane Musky. More like Jane Husky, yikes! Maybe this is just a bad picture, but either the aging process hasn’t been good to her or Tony really had a rough time between Ghost and Scandal.
Taylor Kinney and Lady Gaga. The second these two get married Kinney will be millions richer. I get it. But you can’t tell me the guy didn’t get better offers before the Lady came along. She doesn’t look great WITH makeup on. You’re gonna hafta wake up to this every day, dude.
Robert Pattinson and FKA Twigs. Think of all the teeny-bopper ass that worships the ground this guy walks in. Forget the fact that he’s a mediocre actor who will continue to pick up terrible roles until he’s old and gray. The guy likes anorexic crazies apparently. I dig the crazy hot girl, too. But these chicks ain’t even sort of attractive.
Hugh Jackman and Deborra Lee-Furness. He can sing, dance, and kick the shit out of mutant assholes. How does he not have a hot wife from “down under”? She has power and that’s sexy, I guess. She’s a producer/director and probably had some leverage in this union (or she has “other” talents).