Distracted While Driving

A man in Detroit (of all places) died in a car crash late Sunday morning while apparently watching a porno and losing control. He was ejected from the vehicle upon impact and died at the scene……with his pants off.

Okay, so this is sad. But tell me you didn’t think about laughing before you realized the guy actually died. And who does that shit? I mean, lots of people engage in sex acts while driving. But if you really wanted to watch two rug-munchers in hardcore action you could’ve pulled over and pulled out.

What a terrible headstone this is gonna read. “Here lies John Doe, lost while tugging himself in I-75”.


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