Shitting the Bed

07069609787a2a22ff6bc26039275533Not too often does this happen and even less do I apologize for it. This past weekend featured the worst couple-day period of my fantasy football prognosticating history. Somehow I managed to only pick 5 out 16 games right and then lose out on knockout leagues galore. I’m sure a lot of people got fucked by the way this NFL Week 2 went. But this week threw a little guilt in on the side as people with actual money put their faith in me. The people reading via the internet that don’t make any mention of their interest in my opinion don’t get recognized.

So this is my formal plea; someone pay me money for doing this. Matthew Berry is wrong just as often if not more. He picks 10 sleepers and breakout stars knowing that widening the pool of names may be more work but it certainly offers the opportunity to not completely strike out every time. I mean, I still was pretty great in actual fantasy matchups. But man, my gut feelings were shit this week. Did anyone see the Ravens losing? Yes, Terrell Suggs is a huge loss. But he wasn’t the entire reason why Baltimore was a good team. And even when their offense was crap, the defensive secondary was supposed to be a complete turn-around from last season.

Then you see games like last night’s shocker in Indianapolis. Okay, a lot of people in the media were picking the Jets. And apparently there’s a lot of concerns with how the front office and team leadership work together. But falling this far this fast? And to lose like that at home? Not sure anyone could assume that. Then you look at games like Tennessee and Cleveland where too many (myself included) got caught up in the one-game hype of Marcus Mariota. Then again, the Browns had Manziel starting and hadn’t shown much promise in the preseason.

On and on, you can find examples of things that just didn’t make sense. I’ll be honest, I knew I was swinging for the fences. But this was the week to really figure it out. There were really only a handful of toss-up games like last week. The Giants being 0-2 is less of a surprise than the Falcons being 2-0. The Redskins had a great start in Week 1 and then choked. But the Rams had a better defense and couldn’t lose after the way they played against Seattle, right? And when the Dolphins finally pieced things together the week before, you’d think things would carry over to an easy game in Jacksonville even with a minor injury to the star running back Lamar Miller (who has been terrible so far injured or not).

And in two separate ends of the spectrum, Carolina is undefeated with a win over a Houston team looking for options at QB while praying that Arian Foster comes back in the next two weeks. The Panthers were supposed to be lost without their big-play receiver from last year, Kelvin Benjamin. While there hasn’t been a true answer to that question at wide receiver Cam Newton has stepped up his play as a whole. Still, Carolina hasn’t played a really tough team just yet so we don’t know much. And after a crazy comeback win over the division rival New York Giants, the Dallas Cowboys came limping into the week against a preseason Super Bowl favorite without Dez Bryant. It wasn’t surprising how many points the Cowboys scored, but rather how many the Eagles put on the board. What’s with this high-flying offense and why can’t they get their shit together? Some say it’s toughness. I think it has more to do with Chip Kelly and his insistence that he’s always right. But we shall see.

In summation, if you got most of these games correct you are either A) smart B) lucky or the more likely C) smart and lucky. And you still probably didn’t think this would have gone as well as it did. Hell, I didn’t think I’d do as pathetic as I did. But if you do follow this blog and hold any stock in my predictions then think about this; if I can have one great week where you think there’s a reason to believe then having one bad week doesn’t condemn me to the levels of CBS Sports or one of those other terrible sports media outlets that always get things wrong.



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