White Girls on Fleek

And I stooped this low because nothing is worse.
And I stooped this low because nothing is worse.

Like, what the fuck does that even mean? It’s beginning to make me wish these broads were saying “yolo” and “ratchet” as if they were normal words in the English lexicon. Is there secretly a council of women watching over social media making sure that white girls continuously spew this nonsense? It’s enough that they woke up like this and can’t even. But do they have to be doing something that sounds like that annoying spitting thing your asshole middle-school best friend used to do back in the day (minds out of the gutter, kids).

So “on fleek” means being perfect. You’d think there’d be a more perfect way to say that you’re perfect. On fleek sounds like Lil’ Jon is doing something with you from the window to the walls till the sweat drops down…you get the picture. And honestly, I’m not sure anyone sounds particularly cool saying this shit. It definitely doesn’t sound hip or whatever the purpose is behind it. I’m totally behind the introduction and ebonics and other various languages into the spoken word, but this is a bit forced.

Don’t get me wrong, it’s not just white girls. Anyone that says on fleek deserves a swift kick to the crotch. But who can really even imagine themselves saying it out loud? I can just see them now. Tons of high-pitched annoying girls at happy hour complaining about the guy that doesn’t listen to them because football is on and more important things take precedence over their needyness. That’s more a word than “on fleek”. It could be spelled wrong. I don’t give a fuck. At least it better describes the adjective that is likely the culprit for using such a blasphemous word in the first place. Nothing about your life is “on fleek”. It’s more than likely “on anti-depressants”.


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