Summer Slump

4248ad227ef62f71beccd5cfabd90bd6Has anyone been watching the Women’s World Cup? It’s like watching the WNBA. They aren’t as athletic as the men and there’s nothing flashy (no WOW factor). I feel like I’m watching a one-armed blind dude play FIFA 15. There’s just no execution. Some of the top teams had players with good ideas, they just happened to play at such a slow speed that you know what’s going to happen by the time they get ready to do it. And who are these players? Years ago I could’ve told you a couple names on Brazil like Pretina (spelling?) and Katia. And there were a couple Swedes with recognizable names among other countries. And while parity is great for all sports, having a few more teams do well with even more players with names that no one cares for just doesn’t help the situation. I can’t even tell you more than 6 or 7 names from Team USA. Maybe someone should take their shirt off again. But please make it an attractive one.

Then you watch the NBA and NHL playoffs, or do you? Neither of these sports has been compelling enough to pay much attention. Hockey has never been terribly popular in America, and nothing about this season changed my mind. And it would’ve been nice to see Cleveland win something for the first time in 50 years. But it’s Cleveland and they will continue to lose because who wants to be there, right? Even having the best player in the world (and it’s not really close) might not be enough. Then again, I’d liken the past season to the first in Miami for Lebron James. He took a group of old dudes with small contracts and role players to the NBA Finals.

There is hope for Major League Baseball. Tons of teams are still in the hunt for a playoff spot. While that might make teams less trigger-happy on trades, there will be plenty of interesting games as the season goes on in spite of it’s obnoxious length. And yet there are less fireworks on offense this year. Pitchers haven’t been historically good. Offenses have just been historically bad. Perhaps steroids should be legal. And what’s with the Kansas City Royals starting essentially everyone on the All-Star team? Fan voting will inevitably make more sense in the future, but what about right now? It would be fine if everyone in the KC lineup deserved the nod. Hell, they are having a very good year even after losing some key players to free agency after a surprise World Series run last year. But Kansas City isn’t that populated of a city and I can’t imagine why anyone would be a fan of them outside of the their own state or states (why does KC Missouri have teams instead of KC Kansas? dumb).

And finally, Wimbledon is just about upon us. Roger Federer continues to play well in spite of his age and the other big 4 (who are much younger- Novak Djokovic, Andy Murray, and Rafael Nadal) are all experiencing different ups and downs.  Rafa isn’t the same guy of a couple years ago. It’s sort of like watching Lleyton Hewitt after he married that Australian soap opera actress and became a shit player. There’s just always an injury with Nadal or he’s playing at less than full strength and looking like a shadow of himself. Andy Murray has been solid if unspectacular since, though he’s not a fun personality so unless he’s winning then it’s pretty boring to watch. And the Djoker has gone from being a likable player to entirely too obnoxious for words. So you know I hate Stanislas Wawrinka. Boy, is that guy a dick?!? At least we get to watch John Isner and Ivo Karlovic beam aces for a few rounds. Maybe Serena Williams should play in the men’s field. I’m slightly kidding. Mainly because she and her sister tried playing bros years ago and got put their place (the place of a woman…..kidding, but kinda not).

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