As Winter storms approach and the likelihood that you won’t have many options outside of attempting to carve out a path to the bars, we’ve decided to take a look at the 5 of my favorite things to if the snow won’t let me out.
Netflix until Netflixing isn’t an option. If you’re like me you have probably seen everything you think you want to see on Netflix. But that’s the great thing about the online treasure-trove of TV and movies, there’s always something new and different to discover. So what should you do? Whip out that tablet or laptop and search the best Netflix series to binge on. Hint: I’ve written one or two myself.
Fort City. Did you pretend-build castles when you were younger using all the pillows and cushions on the couch? Of course you did. There were enough to make a sizable entrance and space inside to snooze for one or two. You’d take whatever blankets you had for inside and also as a tarp to use as the ceiling. Well, I know what you’re thinking. Why the shit would I want to do that in my 20s? It’s called nostalgia people. And if you’re stuck inside your house, is anyone else going to catch you doing ridiculous things? No. No they won’t.
Dressing Down. Two things come to mind immediately: Tom Cruise dancing in his underwear to Bob Seger in Risky Business and Zack, Slater, and Screech similarly sliding around while listening to The Beach Boys (only to have the stupid girls knock down the Elvis statue, buzzkill much?). So what am I getting at? You guessed it. Time to strip down to your skivvies and rock out with your cock out. Walking around naked is liberating as hell and will undoubtedly lessen your laundry load and potentially save some water if it comes down to that.
Old-Fashioned American Cookout. Uh, so if you can actually use your grill outside, then this probably doesn’t pertain to you. But who said you can’t grill inside? George Muthafuckin’ Foreman and his 20 kids will tell you otherwise. And who doesn’t love being productive?!? I know. I know. If you have the chance to not have to go into work and drink until your throat burns from throwing up so much, why would it make any sense to stay inside an get work done? Well, my friends, it’s because you can. And after this little meatfest takes place (that’s not supposed to sound like that), you have tons of meals just waiting to be demolished. Then, when others would sit and sleep the rest of the day, you decide to end the day the way any other great cookout would end. S’mores! And maybe you throw on The Sandlot or something else classic to get by.
It’s in the game. Assuming you’re not one of those cool guys that still plays video games religiously (and is probably smoking weed with his buddies in his mom’s basement), then the idea of spending an entire day kicking it on the sofa and pulling out the Xbox or PlayStation is a relatively new idea. This time around there’s no guilt and bullshit in your ear telling you about how much of a waste it is to play 10 hours of Madden or Fifa without getting up.
Note: all of these activities would be best served with a cold glass of beer or other select alcoholic drinks. You didn’t think I was doing any of this sober did you?!?