What’s Your Number?

f0d1837f0a574d8ec141ff6aa6d1b27fWhat’s a sure-fire way to crash and burn on a date? Ask something stupid and personal that likely will come off judgy and nosey. Asking someone how many people they’ve been with isn’t something that should matter. But if it does matter, then it shouldn’t be an issue until two people have made it clear that they are being monogamous.

Back in the day, a girl with a number above 5 was very promiscuous. Guys with more than 2 or 3 were also pretty out of the norm. With sex becoming more mainstream and comfortable within general contexts, numbers continue to jump in what is normal. Casual sex is even more prevalent and single people that hook up with different people (whether regular or random) in the same week isn’t that crazy.

There’s really no such thing as a number too big or small. It’s about the experiences and living. At the end of the day, you have just one chance to do whatever it is you’re here to do. It’s funny though, there’s always been that curiosity as to what is truthful and how realistic people are with their experiences. Going to a big university as a single girl is probably more likely to rack up bigger numbers (no, it’s not a video game) than single guys. But technology has made it easier for the socially awkward/desperate.

Everyone has their own right to make mistakes. In fact, you’re better off making mistakes now while you’re young than doing so later in life because of regret. But a number is just a number, as is age. Right?!? Unfortunately, this generation is over-sexed and undereducated. The relevance of sexually transmitted diseases and AIDS among other epidemics aren’t as widely covered and it’s not exactly a question you bring up in common conversation. Not sure there’s really a good way to go about it.

So adding or subtracting from your assumed number is probably a lost cause. It certainly doesn’t hurt or help your chances after the fact or ahead of it for that matter. Yes, chemistry and attraction and all those good superlatives are very helpful. But someone in single digits might surprise you and someone over 50 or so might not know much different. For dudes, numbers tend to change awareness and whether we are informed enough to at least have some different ideas. Submissive women tend to not ask for too much and generally have experience with lame-duck guys that aren’t much more than two-pump chumps. Assuming you aren’t looking to fabricate anything about your sex life, do yourself a favor and keep it real.


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