That Guy: Who Mooches

Well, if you insist.
Well, if you insist.

Similar to That Guy who likes to prey upon old girlfriends or hookups and loves to stick around until the last minute at the bar to hit up the drunk girls, there’s always the friend that just loves to get shit for free. And who doesn’t love some free stuff (most evident in the video below). This bro is likable in just about every way. He’s not necessarily the charity case, but he will make you feel like it when it’s necessary. Even though you don’t have big bills to make it rain every night at the bar, somehow you’ve got extra funds to buy his drinks.

You’ve been boys for a while or maybe you just went through a serious time together as bros and you feel like the link is too real to just drop because the kid isn’t in a great place right now in life. Well everyone’s been on both sides of it. In college, I was the guy that had the money (albeit, not my own) to buy kegs and such. And for a good bit of time after college, I’ve been the guy that has needed some extra help or couldn’t afford to have the kind of fun most people like to enjoy.

It’s tough. No one likes to make money the issue, especially when it’s the only issue. But there’s a definite difference between asking a friend out for drinks knowing he can’t pay for anything and them either asking you out or asking to come along. When it’s a group thing it’s also a little easier to stomach paying for someone else’s drinks. Yet, there’s always that friend that wants the help and can’t reciprocate.

Growing up, I felt weird helping myself to a friend’s refrigerator much less taking liberties with shit and not offering to help out with stuff. Any time I stay with a friend for the weekend I buy them a meal or two and do whatever else I can to make sure they don’t think I’m just there for a place to stay. Then again, there’s always someone that likes to take advantage of the situation. Sure, having balls and telling them like it is sounds great in theory, but how many people like to treat their friends like that? It doesn’t matter that they are being treated like shit, it’s a matter of principle.

Having that friend that takes everything for granted only to make it all about them really pushes the envelope. Just offering to do something is enough. Most people won’t take anything, and I’m not much different. It’s the dudes that think they can come and go as they please without making much of an effort to give back. I once had a friend that lived with his grandmother and thought it was okay to show up with random girls at my house. Cockblocking isn’t a favorite pastime of mine, but neither is waking up the next morning to find people I don’t know passed out on my couch smelling like sex. Not cool bro. Helping out a brother when they need it is admirable. Becoming that guy’s go-to when he wants something that he can’t afford or make happen on his own is not acceptable.

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