Walking around town this weekend my girlfriend and I were looking for ways to experience something different in our home city without going completely out of our way. We settled upon Dick’s Last Resort to get drinks and hang out on the water for a bit. The place was decent, but not at all fancy. More like a Buffalo Wild Wings than anything else, but it worked for 2 pm on a Sunday afternoon. Needless to say, I didn’t really know what we were getting into before walking in. What I emerged with was the best restaurant experience possible (in theory).
In no way did we have a ridiculously awesome time. It was fun though. However, at Dick’s their pitch is “service with sarcasm”. So you’re telling me that at a restaurant you get to be an asshole and it’s encouraged? Sounds like my kind of job. After working in various service industry jobs I can confidently say that there are only two things you do over the course of the day, bitch about the people you work with or bitch about the customers you’re waiting on. Sure, there are unpredictable tables that might leave a fat tip, or actually have some fucking manners, or even be the understanding couple that makes jokes about the service to ease your stress. But this shit was different.
The waiter walks up with no intention of caring much for our experience or telling us much of anything. He was focused on how much we were going to spend and then called us pussies for not wanting to drink more. That’s genius! To make matters worse, there were no prices on the menu. So we were just blindly ordering shit and hoping the bill didn’t come back too big for what we were willing to pay. They followed it up with handing out hats with negative superlatives for the various diners at each table. My girlfriend got the typical fake, plastic blonde. And yet that was probably more a source of pride for me than anything (terrible, I know). We stuck around long enough to hear the guy berate some midget girl and make fun of a chick with braces. Finally, a place where being the asshole is common. I love it.